Subwoolfer's Lore - What We Know

Last updated: January 18, 2023
(The highlighted portions will be what is new since the last update.)

Ever since I discovered the dynamic duo - nay, iconic duo - that is Keith and Jim, I've been gleaning all that I can about them and the whole Subwoolfer lore. I'm a sci-fi fanatic, so it was only natural for me to dive head first into their story.

Long story short in my quest to know everything about them, I decided to dedicate space to Subwoolfer's lore - everything that is known. Everything here I gleaned is from interviews and their social media, trying to piece it all together and make sense of it. 

A rule of thumb I follow - they have to say it, confirm it, or show it for it to be considered part of this page. I try to make sure the info here is as accurate as it can be (relatively speaking). 

Their socials (click to go there):
Twitter
Facebook
Instagram
Spotify
TikTok

If there is anything that you think I am missing, post it in the comments below - especially if there is any videos/interviews that I may have missed which would give more info on Subwoolfer's lore. I will do my very best to keep this page up to date anytime more of Subwoolfer's lore is revealed.

(Through all of my research, I am constantly amazed just how consistent by what is said in each interview. The whole Subwoolfer lore is something one can get very confused on, knowing what is what, what has been said, etc.)

Some of the info out there, especially on "Twitville," can be quickly identified as them pulling our legs, heavy sarcasm, take your pick. The info here is me trying to distinguish and help distinguish which is joke and which adds to the lore. I will break down everything into categories as best as I can, but I am only human - I am only a Subcub, obsessed with the lore of Subwoolfer.

Please enjoy, and interpret as you will.

IT HAS BEEN ANNOUNCED THAT THEY ARE WRITING A BOOK ABOUT THEMSELVES.

Table of Contents

• 1. YouTube Description | Music


• 2. The Beginning - Before Coming to 2022 Earth


• 3. From the Moon to the Earth


• 4. The Moon


• 5. Technology


• 6. Adjustment to Earth


• 7. Eurovision 2022


• 8. Family


• 9. The Yellow Space Wolves


• 10. DJ Astronaut


• 11. The Translator/Spokesperson

Keith and Jim calls us mainly Earthlings, but they have also called us Earth bugs.

A wise saying: "If at first you fall, hope a banana lands in your lap."
The meaning of life: "Be slay." (Cause apparently "42" is so last century)
Motivational quote: "Don't be shit." and "Don't take a cow upstairs. It won't be able to come down."
Controversial opinion they hold: Cows aren't real; milk comes from milkmen.

YouTube Description | Music

Anyone who has seen and been on their YouTube knows about the general background behind them and "Give That Wolf A Banana":

‘Subwoolfer’ -The biggest band in the Galaxy, first formed 4.5 billion years ago on their home planet, the moon. Since then the brothers, ‘Keith’ and ‘Jim’, have conquered the music scene on every planet, making them the most successful pop group ever. On 20th July, 1969, a prophet named Neil appeared to them in a stable, and was soon hailed ‘the man with the strongest arms’. He promised to return telling them he would help them become the biggest band on his planet too, but only once they had written the greatest song in the universe, sung in his native tongue - English. Neil never returned however, and so now armed with the greatest song in existence, ‘Give That Wolf A Banana’, they have come to earth in search of him, and to claim their musical throne by performing at the most important and prestigious musical event in the history of the world - MGP Norway 2022.

They still are looking for "the man with the strongest arms."

(1) "Give That Wolf A Banana": They heard about grandmas being eaten by wolves; so instead, why not give a wolf a banana? Since giving us this masterpiece, it has "over 40 million streams" which, according to them, "486 million grandmas saved." In simple terms, "everytime you hear the immortal words 'give that wolf a banana' a grandma is saved."

They have mentioned they have the 8-bit music ready for a "Give That Wolf A Banana" video game. (But to be clear, they have not released it.)

(2) "Melocoton": "July 1st 2022 is probably the most historically important day mankind will ever see." This piece deals with their latest obsession, melocotons, also known as peaches. The bass in it is from the moon. Apparently, it is a hit song from all planets. And according to them, it can be described as "Keith every night of the week" aka a banger.

(3) "Howling": A family affair; Luna, their sister is introduced in this one; in their own words, "lock the doors, run and hide, or you could end up being the dinner of a yellow wolf." The "Howling" MV (music video) raises some questions: do the Yum Yum dancers transform every full moon? What is the extent of Luna's martial and fighting skills? Also, Jim leared the "Howling" dance in 8 hours 23 minutes.

(4) "Having Grandma Here For Christmas": An add-on to the classic tale of The Grinch (in the MV). They had been preparing all 2022 for this in their own words, "she was a tough cookie but we eventually managed to twist her arm enough for her to agree to fill our hearts and stomachs with holiday joy."

The Beginning - Before Coming to 2022 Earth

Eons ago, brothers Keith and Jim appeared on the moon suddenly. Keith liked playing the drums while Jim the guitar. Since both liked doing so together, they decided to form a band. According to Jim though, the Prophet Neil was the one to suggest to them to start a band which raises some questions. Regardless, initially they were known as The Chihuahua Hunters; but since Jim couldn't spell it, they soon became Subwoolfer. 

They have traveled far and wide all across the Galaxy. Uranus is an excellent holiday destination, even though they find it small and are quite popular with the locals, and on Saturn, Jim found this great moisturizer which makes his ears shine greatly. The last stadium concert they had there, Queen visited them backstage. They also find Saturn "very sega." Neptune is home to a transformational bug, which has been on Earth: what appears to be a regular human hand is actually a sensory horn.

Mars is also another place they've visited. No details are ever mentioned, but they have said that they are barred from going again. In more modern times, a Mars rover spotted a piece of thermal blanket; Subwoolfer has taken the credit for it, thankful that someone found it. Whether there is a connection between the two is rather unknown. According to them, there is no life on Mars which leads to even more speculation on what in the world happened on Mars.

The Pluto Incident: Pluto also has a history with the band, as confirmed by Subwoolfer themselves. Apparently, Subwoolfer at some point ate it, and this is the real reason why Earthling scientists no longer include it as a planet. The International Astronomical Union were under a strict NDA so that Subwoolfer's Earth debut wouldn't be ruined. 

On some other planets they could not use drums because if they did it would shake the whole planet to pieces. There was one planet outside of our galaxy whose inhabitants were so tiny that Jim almost stepped on one of them. These same tiny inhabitants also made it difficult for Keith and Jim to hear their applauds and cheers due to their stature.

Along their journeys, they have melted "space mantus fighters." Whether they meant "mantis" and what exactly this means is unknown.

Like all big and great bands - Subwoolfer has an arch nemesis. The band's name is Simple Mice, and they hail from the planet Raturn. The exact extent of the rivalry between these two is unknown. Simple Mice might also like bananas. The reason? When a news publication shared a story on how mice can get stressed over bananas, Subwoolfer promptly declared it fake news. 

At some point the two did split up - as some bands do - but they ended up missing each other too much and got back together.

Keith and Jim have visited Earth before during the time of dinosaurs. Unfortunately for Keith, a dinosaur almost ate him; Jim, however, had a good time riding a tyrannosaurus rex. They ended up leaving Earth at that time since dinosaurs weren't fond of music. According to them, the reason why the dinosaurs died out was all because a "savage orang-utan" named Charles.

It is known that Keith and Jim have traveled to London and Barcelona before. When they did is unknown. One year, they even helped out Santa Claus: Rudolph was sick, so they offered to fill in.

According to them, they have invented modeling and have taught MJ basketball and Ronaldo football/soccer, even Michael Jackson how to moonwalk. Apparently, they have received several Nobel Prizes. On what? Details are unclear.

They have revealed that cucumbers are aliens in disguise. No other details are given.

From the Moon to the Earth

Being on the moon got tiresome after awhile, both for Subwoolfer and their Moon fans. These Moon fans still appreciated the band in their own way; however, they were harder to please than before. Keith and Jim were just bored.

And we all know about a prophet named 'Neil' from their YouTube description.
"One small step for Subwoolfer, a big step for humanity." One thing to note is that according to them, the moon landing was actually more of a crash landing.

The two monitored the Earth, doing some research (tapping into satellite feeds, studying for 876 years how humans sing) and especially paying close attention to Eurovision. When they were on their way to Earth, they met DJ Astronaut floating through space and decided to pick him up.

They crash landed on Earth, first landing in Russia, but immediately disliked their surroundings, so they cruised over the hills to Norway, again crash landing (or emergency landed cause "somebody thought he was Tom Cruise"). That is when they met their translator, Samantha.

The Moon

On the moon, there is a secret underground lair - a banana lair filled with banana plants since bananas really are the only things they have eaten before arriving. According to them, mantus stew and tomato is a great combo on the moon.

Flying bananas also can be found, and viruses are non-existent. 

The gravity is much weaker compared to the Earth's (for all my fellow geeks: 1.6m/s2) allowing Keith and Jim the ability to jump very high, 12m to be exact. According to the wolves, their version of thunderstorms are called 'tinderstorms' - similar yet quiet wet, and they also have raindust. There is a bit of delay between the Earth and moon which means Subwoolfer moon fans have to wait to see any stream of Subwoolfer performing. "Moon Song Contest" also exists, with Subwoolfer winning several million times. 

Clapping is also different on the moon: instead of palm to palm, fingers to fingers like it's found on Earth, it is more of upside down palm to palm kind of clap, fingers hitting more the wrists than each other. (This is a description from an interview done during MGP 2022.) 

Different dialects exist on the moon, and it is presumed that moon language is known as "Moonwegian," which takes around 3.5 billion years to learn. It is a possibility that this language is a telepathic one than a spoken one, but there is not enough information to 100% confirm this. Moon language does seem to be all encompassing though. There is a secret hand signal - raise your index and ring finger while the others remain down - which will get you into any venue anywhere. The legal age on the moon is 3 billion years, and the currency found there is known as rubbles. They also have moon pounds.

There are no tiny devices (smartphones, for example) on the moon. They do have something like Spotify called Moonspace.

Their astrology is different on the moon than on the Earth - different dimensions. When asked about it and theirs, all Subwoolfer will say is that they are wolves. Artwork exists, but not like what Earthlings can do. In their own words, "Nobody draws like this on the moon...."

There is a game on the moon which has arrived on Earth and is a favourite there: you go up to somebody and say "I like bananas." There is game like football/soccer called astro pockets. Legend says Jim is a galatic footballer all star.

There are different countries on the moon: Moonerica, Moonralia, Moonany, Moonia, and Moongium.

Their address is as follows:
Keith and Jim
The moon
Sw11

And they are from Crater Manchester. Keith has a mansion which looks suspiciously like the upsidedown from Stranger Things.

Both are presidents and of royalty (according to them). The political system on the moon is reportedly known as Liberal Democraters. They don't elaborate on exact details, but they have mentioned three policies they would enact if they were in charge of Earth:
(1) No politicians are allowed to repeat themselves over and over again in the same interview.
(2) Make wolf not war at all times.
(3) Ban all Internet bullies and keyboard warriors from the Internet forever.

They have a dear friend - "Fortuneteller Belladafella" - who is the wisest toothslayer on the moon. And there is "old school" on the moon.

There are reports which say the moon gets fed. Of what and other details is unknown.

Technology

Keith and Jim have a spaceship much in the shape of the stereotypical UFO (horizontal disc). It is incredibly fast, taking only 1.8 seconds to travel from the moon to the Earth and has some sort of chameleon tech which allows them to blend into their surroundings. For example, their spaceship can be disguised as a cloud. The spaceship presumably runs on both fuel and battery and has a space player on board. Their ship can also go invisible which implies the presence of a cloaking device. There is some speculation on whether or not their ship has strong heat resistance, strong enough to withstand exposure to the sun. This is based on a very cryptic answer from a question which could have possible meanings to it.

Their WIFI password is Susanalbumparty; their old ones were Dontbeship and Wifiwivmylittleeye.

They even have a spare spaceship, parked somewhere on Earth, which may be similar to the one they use in at least function.

They have the ability to time travel. The device used for is called the wolfanator which allows them to time travel so fast that it appears they are in many places at once. It has been particularly useful on their Tinder dates (as they quickly discover the woes of Tinder dating). Whether or not they can "regular time travel" like going back to a specific time is not known. A possibility. But not certain.

They even have shrinking technology. Details are hazy, but one time DJ Astro zapped them "in the wolf machine," shrinking them tinier than an ant. It was a catastrophic mix up, chaos everywhere. There is another chaotic event which seems to point to this technology: one time after getting really drunk, the two wolves woke up inside of Samantha (Translator). Now it is the opinion of the author that this is likely - a crazy adventure inside of Samantha like the Magic School Bus - but it doesn't completely rule out the spicy scenario.

Their name tags have a unique twist to them: they grow on whatever surface the two have exposed at the time - a suit, a shirt, skin. Doesn't matter. They use wolfopetomol to counteract the possible ouchies that naturally arise from inserting a name tag into skin. To grow one, all one has to do is "push."

The two know about hover boards. Whether they own some is unclear, but there is a strong possibility since a regular human skateboard makes them question why ours have wheels.

It seems as if they have some sort of "banana tech." So far, all we have seen is them using a banana to get dressed in yellow suits. It's a bit faulty too, not always dressing them in all pieces of their suits. Also, apparently they only own one suit which may further prove this.

They may have cloning technology, but this is pure speculation based on what happens to Samantha.

They claim they can turn water into peach wine, but no evidence has been presented.

In their technological opinion, they believe "nuggets" will break the Internet.

Adjustment to Earth

The atmosphere on Earth is, obviously, significantly different from the moon's. Because of the water and oxygen in the air, Keith and Jim initially found it difficult to breathe and even sing. The two have adapted to where breathing and singing is second nature to them, finding a system for the latter; however, talking is still an issue, but they can understand English.

When they did land on Earth, Keith met a wolf first which is why he does not understand Norwegian. So presumably this means that Jim can understand Norwegian.

They also found it difficult to adjust to the Earth's gravity. Keith in particular had a hard time adjusting and possibly still has since he gets upset over the fact that he cannot jump as high or move easily. He even became depressed one time, watching TV to cope.

The two thought how they looked would scare people, but they quickly found out people love and adore them, the opposite of being scared. One of the things they have noticed is people run after them, wanting pictures. So one of the things they have tried was to dress and walk smarter, thinking that would help. But it still occurs which they do not understand what they are doing wrong.

In Norway, they know where to go and where not to go.

They enjoy normal Earth activities such as sitting in the park, drinking beer, climbing trees, and chasing cars. Keith and Jim still find earthly things fascinating: they have played around with revolving doors, calling them tricky traps, and have also ridden the staravator (escalator) with great puzzlement.

Bathrooms they quickly fell in love with, especially the quietness that comes with them; and they also find it has good acoustics. One time they rolled on some yellow snow on each other; but, as they quickly discovered after a few hours, it developed a sour odour. According to their translator Samantha, they had a problem with shitting inside; but they deny - and most likely still deny - this claim emphatically.

They also have now a variety of foods in their diet, particularly liking yellow fruits. Top three fruits they like are bananas, melocotons, and kumquats, and they think croissants have nice shells and are fascinated about small treats like candies. Unfortunately, despite the messaging in "Give That Wolf A Banana" and the intention behind it, Keith and Jim still devour grandmas, eating a ratio of bananas to grandmas 20/85 (their numbers). Grandmas are still at risk on Earth, unless Keith and Jim are full. Sometimes, though, they eat ungamorangs which leave a stain of black blood on their teeth now and then.

Keith and Jim both have gotten arrested multiple times. The first time was due to showing their melocotons in public, with Jim struggling the most with the arrest. It should be noted that Jim does love slapping peaches. The reason for the other arrests isn't 100% known.

The two will be sticking around for years to come, flaunting their confidence and style all while continuing to explore Earth and our unusualness.

Eurovision 2022

To them, the sound of beauty is like a flower - isn't it just beautiful? Their dancers are known as the Yum Yums (who quite possibly are from Saturn); they also have robot dancers (robot Yum Yums?), as seen at Melodi Grand Prix, but they were backups until the actual ones arrived on Earth.

Why they chose Eurovision? It is one of the most prestigious shows in the universe, so they really couldn't resist. Their favourite past entry is Alexander Rybak with his neck guitar (violin).

Sometimes, Keith pretended to be Jim, sending signals to confuse the other contestants. One time at a pre-party, they brought the wrong Jim, but they quickly noticed the name tags had the wrong spelling of Keith and Jim, thus rectifying the situation.

Jim had a near death experience at one pre-party. During their performance, his sunglasses flew off, the lights nearly blinding him. He quickly was able to slip those sunglasses back on though. At Barcelona, DJ Astronaut got a little homesick and tried connecting with the spacestation.

When they were at rehearsals and were asked to rehearse at least three times, Keith and Jim thought they were winning. Once they found out they weren't, they were saddened. To this day, they will say that they have won it a bunch of times... but they also will question what it is.

During the finals, they hugged Mika! When the final results came in, they came in 10th. They also won the Best Group award for the ESC Radio Awards 2022, with their song coming in 6th in the Best Song category.

Family

The details on Keith and Jim's family have a lot of unknowns for the most part. They do, in fact, have a sister, and her name is Luna Ferrari. She has specifically expressed her desire to do the Donka Donk with her brothers. She is a little image conscious, but despite that, she appeared in the "Howling" MV, slaying every minute and any monsters that wanted to do harm to her brothers. Luna is 2.5 billion years old and looks much like her brothers except she has long flowing red/burgundy hair. Her outfit consists of all black. She also doesn't seem to be a fan of Christmas and, according to her brothers, is afraid of flying and at times acts like a lunatic. Sometimes, she eats grandpas. Since coming to Earth, she has had some difficulty in breathing here, like her brothers did. There is some question where she lives, but her brothers assure that they have prepared a tiny box for her to live in.

There still isn't a clear indication about their grandma: one interview during MGP, the interviewer asked about their grandmother getting the chance to see their performance, but on Twitter they first say she is no more then say they have only eaten their grandma once. All we have is speculations, with no clear indication of a definite answer.

The two space wolves have an aunt, but there seems to be some confusion on her name. They call her Auntie Susanne, but in a tweet, the use the hashtag #susanalbumparty, which presents another possible name, Susan (and even Susana). Till proven otherwise, the author of this page will be assuming "Susanne." They even have an uncle - Uncle Weirdarius.

Their parents (their Mum and Dad) are not alive, unless perhaps one is a medium. And, according to them, they raised themselves. Their Mum's name is Sharon.

They have two pets: a dog named Alcohol and a steed named Subhorser. There is no certainty about Alcohol as there is no picture of Alcohol, but we have a picture of Subhorser who looks like a robot horse with antlers.

So awesome to be reunited with our trusty steed SUBHORSER 🥰 #subwoolfer @Eurovision pic.twitter.com/ClkiZjfMxh

— Subwoolfer (@Subwoolferband) April 19, 2022

The Yellow Space Wolves

Keith Lockthmith and Jim Morisons-Tesco are brothers hailing from the moon. They are yellow space wolves who presumably got that yellow colour of fur from all the bananas that they have eaten since their beginning. That, or the sun itself gave them their yellow colour. The colour of their blood is also yellow; there is currently no information on why it is, but some theorize that perhaps it also has to do with the consumption of loads of bananas, perhaps with moon bananas holding special properties. 

It is presumed that their noses can glow, but under what conditions is unknown. Their ears grow longer as they age, but according to them it depends. They have yellow eyes and need sunglasses on Earth so that they do not go blind by all the lights found on Earth.  They also wear suits with ties (*cough* much like the Blues Brothers *cough*) which they got from their Granmani. They also do not wear underwear and instead go commando.

An interesting detail about them is they have many tails, as a tweet slightly implies. At first glance, this may seem unlikely since we do not see said tails; however, one interview strongly suggests that they are shapeshifters, shifting shape and figure. The exact details on them shapeshifting is unknown, but they do have a game called "Where's Wolfo?" and have shifted the appearance of their noses multiple times due to being a bit self conscious. They are also fairly flexible.

There are four wolf years to one human year.

It is assumed that they are immortal, but no concrete answer on that is known. Both shed their skin completely twice a day, enough for people to make coats out of them if they so desired. They claim they have all the superpowers. So far, there isn't much to dispute that which means telekinesis, for example, is a strong possibility with them. Flight is also a possibility.

Both laugh on how competitive the two are, with Keith saying that he laughs harder about it.

Jim is the oldest and has sharper teeth while Keith is more incredible and best looking, yet the two argue over who is more handsome. To further distinguish them, Jim is taller than Keith (and according to Keith, Jim is also the fatter one). Just in case, though, the two wear name tags.

They have several fur and skin routines to maintain their good looks, but they do not shower in the mornings. As for their workout routines, they strive for "no carbs before granmarbs." They say they weigh the same as anywhere else, but as we all know, weight and mass are not the same, and gravity comes into play.

The two claim they don't sleep, but an Instagram story shows Jim in a bed with mermaid covers and a tweet has indicated Jim sometimes sleeps upside down. It should be noted that Jim likes unicorns on Monday evenings.

One interview seems to indicate that Keith is more of an eggplant guy and Jim more of a peach guy. No exact elaboration is given.

As for their relationship statuses, it seems as if anything goes. Keith may be single on Tuesdays when he is not with someone - "who isn't he with" - but he also has twenty-six marriages and cannot remarry unless one of those twenty-six ends; he may also have eight children. Jim also may be single on Wednesdays between 15:36 and 16:02 (3:36PM and 4:02PM); what exact time zone is unknown but presumably CET (Central European Time). He is possibly married to Jima... possibly cause Jima could be just Jim with a wig. It isn't known whether he too has twenty-six marriages, but he does have thousands of children.

One can also learn about "make wolf" in the Snarlosutra. And they apparently reproduce in re studio.

"Kim" and "Jeith" may most likely be Keith's and Jim's names smooshed together, but these names could also be the names of their "clones." The two sometimes call each other K and J as nicknames. The two also call legends "segends."

Their native tongue is inaudible to the human ear, possibly very high pitched as they can communicate with domesticated dogs, but they implant responses directly into their translator's brain so that they can verbally communicate with us Earthlings. The two have moves from out of this world, but they also try to copy human moves. It seems as if they've been picking up many different languages - Arabic, Dutch, French, etc. Their grip on understanding some things is questionable sometimes, but one can chalk that up to them love fooling around and messing with Earthlings.

Keith seems to be the one who is in charge of their social media accounts. How much Jim knows what is posted is unknown, but he has in the past answered some Twitter questions which leads to the conclusion that he has some access to their accounts. It is possible that Jim prefers the face to face connection over the responsibility of running an online presence. This isn't 100% certain, but we do know that Jim is an attention seeker while Keith is a media whore.

They are rapidly becoming the grammar and spelling police, correcting others of their crimes, yet they themselves struggle with the subject often. They also love puns and smushing words together to make new ones as well as putting "wolf" into any word they can. For example, a curse word of theirs would be "cunwolf."

One of them has a phobia of donkeys, presumably Keith since he tends to answers Twitter questions.

They know different instruments outside of a guitar and drums, though they do like to mainly play the kazoo. There is the bananica, and they have played piano, deeming it as a weird guitar. Obviously, they both dance which the two have rated each other on: Keith rates Jim's a 5/10 while Jim rates Keith's a 7.6/10. In their singing range, they can reach eighty-four octaves. It is said that one can hear the wolves howl at 8,976 km... at least according to them.

Keith considers himself the rudest, but both do not understand why people think they are people under some masks. The two space wolves studied "slaying" on the moon. They find not slaying to be weird and sometimes embarrassing, if caught.

They have mentioned that there is a human singer that they're inspired by: that human is Britney. ("You gotta work, bitch."). As they explore Earth's different cultures, they discover some favourites, but their favourites are ever changing. Their least favourite baby name is Duncan (but they also hate names Ben and Gaute), and their least favourite colour is purple. 

They also play video games, Earthworm Jim being one, and have even played rock, paper, scissors for many, many Sundays. They even have a guilty pleasure song, "Macarena."

They obviously like any grandma but prefer alive ones and find the tastiest ones are in Norway. They have also smelt a naked grandma before but found the smell not the best. Grandpa's, however, are their least favourite; and they would rather eat grand pianos instead. However, what might get them to eat a grandpa is "the dark." They do not eat cats either, finding them lazy, nor do they like chicken. However, they have said that sometimes they snack on grandma cats. Blue foxes, they find, are tasty. A Grandma 4 is what they call the meal between luch and dinner.

Bananas are one of their favourites since they are lovely, yellow, bendy, and tasty, and eat them peeled, though their proper etiquette of eating a banana is eating it whole. Nineteen bananas is apparently too many bananas, but in what measurement is unclear. They even name each of their bananas and like big ones. If they do not eat the bananas, they probably would use them as banana darts. They are also very appreciative of receiving bananas, as indicated in a press conference at Eurovision. 

According to them 10,000 bananas equals one peach. A Bloody Wolf is diesel and peach juice. 

Avocados they seem to like, but only ones that appear like magic from Keith's butt. And they really like Jupiter melons.

They also like fish but only salmon. Apples they do not like - "everybody knows wolves don't like apples" - and cherries they find dirty.

Keith has very bad aim but good handwriting. Jim melts in warm water, and Keith is afraid of water.

Jim is a bit of a klutz, walking into walls now and then and even falling down four times when practicing choreography, but loves to hug especially when he feels unwell. Keith, when he was seven, trained in Karatakenoshit and eventually earned a black belt in it.

The biggest prank they've even played on somebody was the Plank Prank. Whether it is similar to our Planking Trend (or the Lying Down Game) is unknown. They also love celebrating all sorts of holidays - their birthdays, Christmas, etc.

Keith and Jim seem to do everything together and are pretty inseparable. The two wolves do quarrel, like any sibling relationship do, with their last quarrel dealing with girl trouble.

Sometimes they live together, and sometimes they do not. Despite making a home on Earth, they visit other planets on a regular basis and come and go to the moon and Earth. But the moon will always be special in their hearts.

DJ Astronaut

DJ Astronaut's full name is David Jamal Astronaut. He met Keith and Jim when the two wolves picked him up on their way to Earth. He is Subwoolfer's DJ and translates the inaudible to audible. He will be the one who will translate past Subwoolfer songs, like their biggest hits from Venus and Uranus (with perhaps some help). He also helps with translating moon moves to Earth moves (along with a Norwegian).

Apparently, DJ is part man, part wolf, but he seems to be afraid of Luna.

He has been seen in two suits, his most recent one for Eurovision being a needed change since his other one was torn and old. His suit is also a super suit in which he can go to any planet without any issues. For example, for hot climates or weather, it has an advanced cooling system. He is also six times smaller than what we are made to believe inside his suit.

He has also been to clubs on Earth and finds them fun. Like the legend he is, David Jamal can lay down some sick bars.

There are reports that say he eats air, and that he is single on Fridays between 8 and 12. Whether those times on Friday is for every Friday is unknown.

The Translator/Spokesperson

There have been two translators, but only one most are familiar with - Samantha Pantha.... Samantha Cox (Courtney's apparent sister, according to the two wolves)... Samantha Pantha-Cox? Which seems likely.

Sam met Keith and Jim one day while fishing near the woods. The wolves needed a translator to communicate with us Earthlings and decided Sam was perfect. They took over his brain and installed some protocols, but sometimes he doesn't say what they want him to say. He has one time said "send help."

Sam has mentioned how Keith and Jim has tried teaching him singing, but he is convinced it is simply hopeless. Sam is married to Samoontha.

Despite the two wolves saying they sacked Sam, Sam very much is still around and is held in high regard. Unfortunately, Sam seems to die a lot. What details on that is not exactly clear.

As for the second translator seen with them in London during the time leading up to Eurovision 2022, not much is known.

Lots of information, eh?

I for the likes of me have zero artistic abilities - can't draw to save my life. But this? This I can do. Whenever I do my updates, I will periodically move around some things and adjust some sentence structure for better flow and layout.

Again, drop a comment if I've missed anything and where I can find that info. And thank you for visiting this page! If you like to follow me on Twitter for when I update or for any hot takes I might have, click here.